Hey :)
After a while, I think it's time for me to move on. After all the tears that I've wasted, after all the sleepless night that I went through, after all the pain that I hold by myself -
It's time for me to let you go.
It's funny how hard I'm holding onto us but you don't have any effort to back me up. Honestly I don't know if I'm doing a right thing. But, I really hope this decision will make myself feel better, just like how I met you.
Meeting you, knowing you.
I never regret any of it. It's just sad how easy we become stranger again. After all the moments we share, the memories, the laughter, the pain, the stories. I will try to keep every single of it in my mind, even some of it hurts me a lot.
You teach me a lot of thing and I'm really grateful to always hear your piece of mind every time you talk to me. After all, having the endless night talk with you, talking about random things, those morning and night calls, those wake up call just so you didn't miss your class, I already miss all of it since the day you decided to stop talking to me. It's hurt but I know this is for your own good. I'll try to be happy seeing you happy after this .
I honestly hope that I'll be happy lmao. I know my absence aren't something that will make you feel losing, so I can't say you'll be happier or whatever it is. I just hope you'll always be safe and just being you.
In those particular week, you made me feel something I never had before. I missed your voice, being nervous over a notification and your phone call since your ringtone is different from the others, waiting for the time to pass so I can call to wake you up, even just for a few second, waiting for the night to come so I can wish you a good night and you just went straight calling me just to share about random things you watched on Tiktok before I sleep. Those are my happy moments with you that I won't forget.
If you're reading this, I just can tell you that you held a special place in my heart, honestly. Before this, I'm trying so hard to moving on and it seems like I really can't and I do still putting hopes on you. But I know at one point I need to put a stop on this. I'm gonna get hurt in the end so I decide to stop running after you.
I'm gonna move on, from you :) Thank you for the memories, thank you for all the things that we've done. I never regret any of those. And you'll always be one of the best human being that I've ever met.
One day, if we actually met. I want to tell you how much I adore you before this. You held a special place and you still are until I found someone better than you HAHAHA.
For you,
h.
